kyle.

OKAY FOR REAL NOW,

why does he keep letting me back into his life to be friends and then slamming the door in my face. When I tell him I give up on this friendship that I try to keep going he pulls me back in and says crap that he doesnt want to lose connections with me and yada yada and to be honest, what does it even matter anymore? A friendship or any kind of -ship is not one where one person pulls all of the weight and the other twiddles their thumbs. I once again have given up on this. In all honesty, I don't want to be friends with him anymore at all.. because I don't think this is a friendship more like I'm worried that he's dead in the gutter somewhere and I would never know because he won't get back to me.

Last Friday (or Fryday according to Lupita's in Mexicantown) he called me like 4 times and sent me text messages upon text messages when I was trying to get my night going for Artie (getting a new phone, sushi and thai food all set, parking, directions -- which I still got lost, financial situations aka getting money from my mom because Im 'po'). Like I understood that he wanted me to call him back - no need for two text messages asking me to do so. I get the point, I'm a good friend, I'll get back to you when I have a free second. Okay, his girlfriend cheated on him and then broke up with him.. Karma sucks, doesn't it? I guess I tried to console the kid as best as I know how (not very well) but.. whatever. Next day it was the same thing until mid day. Since then, I've called him to make sure he is not dead somewhere in the gutter but he won't return my calls at all.

Okay, I give up. I'm tired of worrying about him, I tired of just being there when he needs me to be there but him not being there when I need him to be. I need the reassurance that he is fine, especially after he is so distraught.


Turns out he is back with the girl that cheated on him and that's why he's not calling me. .. Well, sucka' friendship is a two way street and I'm not down with myself being the only one driving on it.










friends can suck a lot.